The canaries - a tale of inquisitive Ajey

Last night we watched “Zero Dark Thirty"

Ashish and I watched it in theaters but many a times watching at home helps and this was one of the movie. Ajey loves history so he sat with us too. My rule follower son Anand refused because it was rated R.

So we started movie and it took longer than its course. So many side references and we had to talk about it. Ajey was 4 when 9/11 happened but he amazed me with his knowledge. I know he is similar to me in many ways. ( though I am so glad he got his dad's Math and Science brain) we both love to read things which are useless and have nothing to do with us, Wikipedia links have the power to take us anywhere. We both wonder around when we come back we realize how much time we “wasted” .

Last night was one of those reminders that it is never useless, we gain knowledge.

So we were watching the movie and talking. He knew many details and events, but the most amazing detail for me was " the canaries" those were the special planes that took the seals to kill Osama Bin Laden.

And I just said why name them canaries- Ajey replied - the canneries are the bird used in coal mine to assess danger. If they stop chirping you get out. And we moved on to the movie. But this one thing got stuck with me. Those tiny little references, minor details they all have those Wikipedia, redit, twitter and face book stamps on them, he not only reads, he remembers and uses them when needed.

I know it might sound like I am bragging about my son. Please believe me we had been through enough of fights when we both didn't agree on anything. We both thought the other one thinks I know nothing or I know everything and you don’t understand me :)

But this time I do think my 17 yrs old does know many things and I have no idea about them.

Is there really a thing called "private" when it comes to your FB profile?

I have been thinking about it for few days. I was about to update my status one day and suddenly stopped, thinking did I really want all my "friends" to read this.

I was wondering if I really want to share few of my pictures or status updates to my ex- students or my nieces or nephews?

I know there are few settings and you can limit the audience and what not.

Believe me I had done all that before. When I had few friends (cannot even imagine now) I used to do custom setting, then after 50 I think I made groups for family, distant families, friends, friends 2 and few more I rather not disclose here. But now I have over 300 friends, it's so difficult to maintain those lists. I did try few times to "update" the lists though.

I have my school friends, college friends, friend's families, my students, few of my husband's friends, their wives, his friends from school and two different colleges, his various jobs and my friends from different places I lived in, few groups I became part of.  Off course when I make friends or accept the request I make sure I know them personally most of the time.

Then you meet people out of these categories and they are your friends now.

So far I am not including my colleagues as my FB friends but sometimes I feel left out at work when they all talk about FB. I am still not considering opening my facebook profile to work gossip.

In my Marketing class we had a discussion how the HR is screening the candidates from facebook profiles. And that got me thinking again about pictures on FB.  I can make my profile private or very restricted but I am still widely visible on FB.

I keep everything restricted only to the friends or to certain list but how about my friends who keep their profile open to public or to their friends?

 So here I am thinking what’s next? What should I do? Is there anything I am missing in privacy setting or just not post anything personal? The later is not so attractive choice as I really love my FB circle.. Any suggestion or what do you all do?

This post is much about facebook, will write more about other aspect of privacy soon.

Aa neele gagan tale, pyar ham karen….Saamne baithe raho singaar hum karen..

Every time I come back from Sa Re Ga Ma and next morning I relive that night again telling Ashish all about it. This Sat was no exception, driving to Newton next morning  in that storm all I could think of how fun it was to meet and listen all of you. When I woke up next morning, it was Benuji’s song from second round I was singing.. uh?? Ok trying to hum.. I am thankful that we could ask few of them to sing again. This song was the highlight for me. Song of the evening –

Neele gagan tale pyar hum kare.. Its 4 days and this is still going strong ;)

What a night... I was supposed to be the host and tried hard to pack and get ready for everything from spare disposables to sheets to some snack and cleaning supply to what not. But it was just not my night.. The usual place – Club house had no heat. It didn’t take seconds for Sunanda and Praveen to open their home and heart to us. I am just amazed and still think it’s one of those times when you believe that “goodness” still exists. We all love the group and wait for that special night but accommodating so many people in a snowy night without warning needs lot of courage.

So finally we settle down with food, so many new addition so it was socializing hour, finally we could began our mahfil after the dinner and then there was no stopping. What a night it was..

We started with Dr. Shetty’s – Dil Ghoom Ghoom kare, It was a real tribute to Bhupen Hazarika. Dr. Shetty has a very unique voice and amazing selection of songs. He sang another song – mere man ki ganga..from Sangam

Praveen made us dance on his tune with Nazar na lag jaye from Night in London. I do call him Hemant Kumar but he sang Rafi’s song beautifully.

Rohini had to make Gauri and Jaya rock the dance floor with Kajara Mohabbat wala.

Prabha Srinivasan joined us for the first time and she sang pyar kiya to darna kya from legendary Mughal- e-Aazam.

Shobhana di changed the whole romantic mode to fun and more fun.. Oh boy it was whole different world when she sang damadam mast kalandar, the most famous Kawwali. With her wonderful voice she was sitting and singing and I have no idea what I was doing other than clapping and singing with her.

Ruchika is another great addition, she sang Jagjit Chitra’s- Socha nahi achha bura..

Gauri sang a popular beat in her style – Morani baga me bole aadhi raat ma from Lamhe.

Our darling host Sunanda was next with Rang dil ki dharkan bhi lati to hogi- from movie Patang. I wonder how could she be so calm with so many people in her house but she was her Sunanda self -smiling and calm and it reflected in her voice too.

Benuji brought Umraojao alive with Dil Cheeze kya hai aap meri jaan lijiye..it is one of my fav song but for me her second song took over everything that night.

Meenaji has been singing classical based and it’s a good change for all of us – With her Shankar Mahadeo Bhajan, we needed that calmness after adrenaline rush from all those fast beats.

When I invited Chitro I knew he will bring something different, after that Kolavari songs we expect anything nontraditional and he didn’t disappoint us and sang tum miley to jeena aa gaya.

Pratibha also sang yaron nilam karo susti an old song in a new fresh style, Great job Pratibha. We missed Preetesh but loved to have you.

Anu Chitrapu was a new voice to the group too, she is so soft spoken but when she started singing I couldn’t believe the strength in her voice. I didn’t understand a single word it was in Tamil but Music had its own language and we all felt that.

Manohar Rao sang hazaaron khwaishein aisi ki har khwahish pe dam nikle.. It’s a very difficult ghazal to sing and he did a wonderful job. I cannot even hum this ghazal forget about singing.

Vinodji sang one of Mohd Rafi’s best - pukarta chala hoon main gali gali bahar ki is usual charming vinod style, in second round he sang jo tumko ho pasabd wahi baat karenge I enjoyed watching Kamal more than anything, She was beaming with pride.

When I asked Ruma to sing I knew she would bring Bangali treat for us, now I think we are diversifying our group. Ruma and Shobha Di sang Bengali song, Anu sang Tamil song we might hear some more languages soon I hope. In second round Ruma sang Ekla chalo re and we all understood some of that song. It’s  so much fun watching Shobha di and Sudarshan singing with her.

Sudarshan sang kabhi khudpe kabhi halat pe rona aaya and it was beautiful, he sang Jeena Yahan marna yahan in second round. Usha Raju sang tujhse naraz nahi zindagi from Masoom. Dyutimaan da teri duniya mein jeene se to behtar hai ki mar jaen… dada no more sad song from you... it was a heavy song for me and I am so glad Lata Rao made me happy again with her fun voice and happy style -Jane kYa tune kahi, jane kya manie suni.

Sudipto and Namita are new addition to the family, we were about to start our Duet session and Sudipto’s Guitar was perfect break from singing. He sounded so soothing and melodious.

Meena and Brij are fun when they sing together - Deewana mastana hua dil janey kaha hoke bahar aayi

Shobhana di and Dada sang Lokachuri- from Kishore Kumar collection in Bangla.

It was a fabulous evening but it was time to call it a night. I am sure we all drove back home singing and talking. Every month we get more from last month and this time it was no different.

Imagine a scene in my kitchen – I am cooking and Ashish helping me with dish washing. Music is on my counter and suddenly he asked did you sing last night or you are singing next month and I asked why ? He said you always hum but today you didn’t stop at mukhada only you are singing antara too ;)

It was Benuji’s Neele gagan tale song..

see.. That’s what being a part of Sa Re Ga ma do to you J Don’t you all agree with me???

Am I becoming my Mom and Dad?

How many of us swor in our teen years that we would never be what our parents are. Hated their rules, dismissed their ideas and thought they need to learn more and try new stuff.

Well I love my mom and dad and still feel some times things could have been differnet if they had different way of thinking.

I do disagree to few of their philosophy But i feel I statred to agree their way in few areas as well.

I was the oldest and wasnt a typical girl, loved doing things my way.

Was a smart student but never worked hard. I read a lot, wrote a lot and did many more stuff other than studies. I would read books and dictate the notes to my friends but never read from those notes, she was the topper and I just maintained my good grades. But I read everything other than text book.

Now I see the same thing with my son and get angry with him. Somehow i  now feel that  Math and Science should be the highest priority. I didint work hard enough but I want my son to do that. It makes me mad if he ignores his studies and play games or you tube or facebook. 

Double standard???? Any thoughts...

What Mark Zuckerberg did to us…

During December vacation i had invited few friends for dinner at home and during one of those dinner i realize that i was meeting my friend’s husband n son for the first time, for those almost 3 hours we all kept on talking and talking, like old friends. It was their first visit to our home but we all felt we knew each other for a long time.

She is my facebook friend so we have seen each others family picture, read status updates and did some small chit chat in last few months, met few times without families but having them home felt so close to heart, not first time visit.

Another time when my husband introduced himself to one of my other friend as Jaya's husband she replied oh yah I know have seen your pictures on FB :)

I feel so happy and lucky to have that kind of social network.

I always been a social butterfly and never believed in gender-biased friendship, belonged to a small town but had friends in all color, size, age, religion and gender.

Always had a close relationship not only with my friends but their families, relatives and friends too. I was a friend with my friend’s grandma to their tiny cousins.

Later I took my husband’s friend as my friend but facebook again gave me another circle of friends. Most of them are successful women but for me their success lies in their personality.

I never felt that their career or money or status is a barrier in our friendship.

It’s all because of facebook. We feel we all know each other so well. We don’t get to meet often but we are so well connected everyday through facebook. We almost TALK everyday as status updates and comments, thoughts, suggestions, compliment and what not.

I know my FB friends are next to me when I am happy, down or sad or angry. My day begins with their thoughts and end with their messages.

Mark Zuckerberg, we love you for giving us so many valuable relations.

When you started the face mash it had the whole different philosophy behind it. You wanted to see girls and see...we found friends...Thank you..

"Kazra Muhabbat wala…"

Oh my my what a treat for a musical night.. Thank you all Sa Re Ga Ma friends..

I can close my eyes and still hear those beautiful melodies.. It was a treat for all of us.I don’t sing but I enjoy music, being with you all made the long drive worth it. Thank you Sudarshan, I enjoyed introducing everyone and being with all.

Now I will try to put down my happiness on paper.

First of all I would like to thank Sunanda and Praveen Sahay for arranging the clubhouse for us. Thank you Meena and Brij Singh for hosting the event.

Its always a challenge to be the first one.. After a quick introduction to the whole group Meena did a great job starting the night for us. The Classical she sang was the perfect night opener.

Then came our Ms fun Gauri Chandana  with song "Tumhe ho na ho mujho itna yakeen hai" – Oh my we were back in those Golden days of our life, when the playfulness was the fun of love. Thank you Gauri, to take us back in time machine.

It was the first time I heard Praveen Sahay and now I am sure we all want him to sing Hemant Kumar all the time, "Ye nayan dare dare".. We needed this tranquilizing melody after Gauri’s song.

The Chatterji Couple was the next – Chat sang – "Chalke teri ankho se sharab aur jyada" he just took us in another romantic era reminiscent of Goblets and Ghazals , and Shobha di brought us back to Meera’s devotional world – "Payo ji maine Raam rattan dhan payo"..

Every month we get to meet new people and listen to new styles of singing.This Friday wasn't the exception and we got to hear couple of new singers.

Anisha was a delight to hear.( we named her Sanyukta for the night because she was with Prithiviraj last night. She sang "Mera kuch saman tumhare paas pada hai". It was a tough song and she did a great job with a deadly combination of Asha and Gulzar’s sublime dance of words and notes on Pancham Da's composition.

Thank you.. we cannot wait to hear more and more from you. It was a very soothing song and then came the Phatakha song of the night..Another great new face to the group – Suraiya and I thought her name is musical enough. I grew up listening Suriya and couldn’t wait to hear what was she bringing to us and yes “Kazra Mohhabat wala”

That is an evergreen song, older than me and wow Suraiya was too good. Asha Bhosle and Shamshad Begum were right there with all of us.. I just couldn’t stop and many of danced to her tunes.

Sudarshan was the next with "Jindagi bhar nahi bhoolegi" – we all were soaked drenched in feelings.. His is always very good with his mesmeric eclecticism.

Then Vinay Goel sang another - Hemant Kumar gem - "Seene me sulgate hai arman".. his voice was perfect for the song.

Last night was a perfect combination of fun and different songs. After the calmness of Hemant Kumar , Chanchala sang a

Bhojpuri song for us -"Jheeni jheeni ahrachea ke paar goria", Anuj, Next time you will sing for us.

Rohini Mehta- sang the title song from "Kabhi alvida na kehna".

Then came my favorite part of the night - The couple song

Brij and Meena singh- "Bahut shukria badi meharbani".  

That song has lot more than just words.. It takes us to another world of love.

I grew up in MP in India. So listening Ruma Sing in Bengali opens up

another dimensions for me. I didn’t understand the words but it felt great.- "Amra sabhai raja"..

Another fun song last night was Manjul Nigam singing "Bemurawaat bewafa begana ye dil aap hain" to her husband :) he was sitting right there and we all enjoy listening to her and watching him.

Meetu Gupta sang "Daba daba sa sahi dil me pyar", a tribute to Jagjit Singh..Its his signature song and was a perfect choice for the evening.

Then came Sesha with his charm and fun style and sang

"Jeevan ke safar me rahi milte hain bichad jane ko" and

"Lekar ham dil deewana dil phirte hain manjil manjil" .. we cannot wait for next month to hear more of our Kishore Kumar.

The good bye song of the night was a timeless classic– "Aaj jane ki zid na karo".

Sudarshan, Meetu, Manju and Anisha sang together and yes none of us were ready to let the night end.

Here is the list for second round and third round.

After 11 we all were supposed to wrap up and clean the place and I asked  Sudarshan to sing another Mohd. Rafi hit – "Ehsaan tera hoga mujha par" And apart form his singing the fun part was Mustapha and Prakash Bhaiya singing with him, Then all of us. That was the best way to end the night. I am sure we all drove back home singing the same song.

Thank you folks for the memorable night , hope lot more to come and sweep us off our feet.

Next round -

Praveen Sahay - "Na tum hame jano"

Shobha di & Chat - "Kahin door jab din dhal jaye"

Guari - "Saiyan dil mein aana re, aa ke phir na jana re"

Suriya - "Piya tose naina lage".

Vinay goel - "Kahan le chale ho musfir . Sitaro se aage"

Rohiti Mehta - "Aati rahengi baharen"

Ruma Neogyi - "Nache re .. aache re"

Gauri - "Chura liya hai tumne jo dil ko"

Sudarshan - "Kal chaudawi ki raat thi"– special Thank you

from me

Suraiya - "Raat akeli hai bujh gaye diye"

Gauri - "Ye mera dil pyar ka deewana"

 Sudarshan, Prakash bhaiya and Mustafa and all of us- "Ehsaan tera hoga mujh par"

RIP - Don't rest in peace - Return please..

After mourning for over 2 weeks today I write to pay tribute to two special men in my life. Steve Jobs and Jagjit Singh... Will my techy and musical life would ever be the same?

Jagjit Singh is not just the name of a singer he was an experience to listen or see him sing. I would say could I ever see him sing no it was to feel him all around you.

I remember I was 11-12 when I heard my uncle play his LPs. My dad was never into ghazals so my summer trips to my uncle’s home were the starting point. I still remember his collections of LPs. That started my love affair with Jagjit Singh’s voice. Slowly I collected his cassettes first then cds and now I can say I almost have all his ghazals.

Jagjit Singh gave different meanings to emotions. When Ashish and I were apart it was Jagjit Singh's ghazals which kept me going, made my tough days bearable. He was the one who could sing “mere jaise ban jaoge jab ishq tumhe ho jayega” or “socha nahi achha bura dekha suna kuch bhi nahi” and forever changed what Love is. We lost our dear friend in 97 and I remember it was Jagjit Singh who sang “aapni marzi se kahan ke kidhar ke hum hai” and I felt he was just narrating our loss. It felt so close to heart and i cried in every live performance for Ashutosh when he sang that.

For me Jagjit Singh is the memory of my newly wedded life. Ashish and I could stay up whole night listening to Jagjit Singh. I cannot thank that silken voice to make my years beautiful, in love. We both are not even bathroom singers but Jagjit Singh sang for us to each other.

Now when I think of it he practically lived in my bedroom to kitchen to the basement. Thanks to my another love, Steve Jobs, I could carry the magical voice everywhere.

The first concert Ashish took me to in Pune was the experience I would hold close to my heart all my life. I had no idea when I left my seat and walked to front and just stood there. All I remember later that Ashish held my hand and brought me back. It has been a joke that I was in some other place that night.

I had been lucky to listen to him live few times and was amazed how he could be so entertaining. So much energy and enthusiasm and so professional. Last  year I saw him in Boston and I feel blessed that I could make to that show.

But is that enough for me? I feel that one part of me is just empty now. I have his ghazals but what would I look forward to. He sang enough to last lifetime but still the feeling that he is not around is very depressing.

It was Steve Job’s death when I realized that I chose to ignore the truth, didn’t want to face it.  We all knew we won’t have him for very long but I was expecting miracle. But sure enough Steve Jobs was needed more someplace else.

I have been an Apple fan forever. But when I look back I wasn’t just an Apple fan, I was a Steve Jobs devotee. It was his personality which drove me to Apple. His iPhone introduction speech was the first thing I heard from him and oh boy I was hooked.

I did wait for a year before buying my first iPhone but after that I have been in love with Steve jobs and his ideas.

I had owned an iPod and bought a touch for Ajey but it was the iPhone what changed my world. I was addicted. He always thanked his team and talked about team efforts but I respected him for his vision. He is the one who changed the way we have music in our life. Just music nah, how we live our life. So when I turned 40 all I wanted that damn iPad and lucky for Ashish just a week before it was announced.

My 40 birthday was great, thanks to Steve Jobs. I loved my gift like no gift ever.

I mourn for a visionary and I hope Apple can continue his legacy. But for me I just cannot go to Apple like before. It’s been days and I push myself everyday to move on but what I would do to the emptiness I feel. We would get new singers, innovators but I don’t feel hopeful. This is the time when I want to believe in Hindu believe of Reincarnation and don’t wish Moksha for them. Please come back, don’t rest.. we need you.